In Conversation With merci, mercy
Photo by Maybelle Thieu
Now based in Sydney, Australia, alt-pop artist merci, mercy has always been a citizen of the world, from Beijing to Thailand. With 12 million streams to her name, it’s clear that her music, which explores her struggles with substance abuse, is just as wide-reaching and resonant with listeners of every background. Her just-released single “Sick To My Stomach” is one of the many brilliant tracks from her upcoming EP that hopes to shed light on the truth behind teenage addiction–all behind a catchy chorus, buzzing synths, and layers of heavy guitars. merci, mercy has learned to express herself in the best way she knows how.
We caught up over Zoom to chat about her musical family, the evolution of her sound, and what she hopes to offer listeners through her music.
[UNPUBLISHED]: You had a unique bringing that included being surrounded by a highly musical family. Can you talk us through more of what your childhood was like?
[MERCI, MERCY]: It was okay! I was always jealous of my sister because she’s a jazz singer so her voice is extremely beautiful and mine has always been a bit odd. But I love my sister. Now she does weddings and I sing.
[UNPUBLISHED]: Was there a moment when you knew that music was something you wanted for yourself?
[MERCI, MERCY]: I always wanted to be a musician. I didn’t know how but I forced myself to learn guitar, to sing and play. I could not sing to save my life from 9 to 14. But I sung every single day and just got better. If you want something that badly, you get it.
[UNPUBLISHED]: I understand you’ve lived in Beijing and Thailand as a kid - how did all that come about?
[MERCI, MERCY]: My mum’s an English teacher and she’s had five kids, I was the youngest. She was just sick of living in one spot. So she was like, “Merc, you wanna go to Beijing?” And I was like, “Yeah, what do I pack?!” It was so much fun living overseas.
[UNPUBLISHED]: What did you enjoy about that time?
[MERCI, MERCY]: When I was living in Beijing, I loved being able to be independent, catching the subway by myself, going to the mall, hanging out with friends. Not needing to be supervised because I felt safe. Moving and changing and everybody seeing me as a new person. I think I found who I was there.
[UNPUBLISHED]: Who are a few artists that you look up to?
[MERCI, MERCY]: Amy Winehouse because she’s raw and honest. I feel like we sing about the same stuff like substance abuse. And I really love James Morrison. My mum would listen to him on the car radio when we went to OzTag together. He’s really good, his voice is amazing, and he speaks openly about this stuff as well. And The Beatles.
[UNPUBLISHED]: What’s the story behind your artist name merci, mercy?
[MERCI, MERCY]: Everybody would call me Mercy but I would use “y” and some people would use “i.” I’m really indecisive so I didn’t know which one to choose and my friend at the time was like, “Just use both.” And I was like, “Oh my god, that’s brilliant!” It wasn’t even me, it was my friend.
[UNPUBLISHED]: Let’s say you’re ready to sit down and write a song. Can you walk us through your general creation process?
[MERCI, MERCY]: I just have to be sad or coming up from being sad. I can’t be in the moment of being sad because then it’s just not good writing at all. And a little bit of alcohol helps sometimes.
[UNPUBLISHED]: Last year you released your highly successful single “Winnie Crush,” which now has over 1 million streams and has allowed you to be featured in covers of several Spotify playlists, as well as other accolades. What was your reaction to all that success?
[MERCI, MERCY]: I was so confused because I didn’t know if people overseas would get the “Winnie Blues” because that’s a cigarette brand and I buy the Optimum Crush ones. I was shocked that people liked it so much but I was also happy because I hadn’t released music for a while. Seeing everyone love it, I was like, “Mmm, yes! So good!”
[UNPUBLISHED]: Was it nerve-wracking to be so open about your substance abuse when you first wrote about it in your music?
[MERCI, MERCY]: It was definitely hard because I feel like a lot of older people look at you like, “You haven’t even lived life yet, why would you have a problem with alcohol and cigarettes?” But people our age have had to experience a lot more stress and anxiety because of social media. That leads you to drink more because you want to be cool, you want to have friends. Then it turns into something bad because you can’t go out unless you have a few drinks or a social smoke with a friend so you can get out of being around heaps of people.
[UNPUBLISHED]: Would you say you use music as a therapeutic outlet or coping mechanism?
[MERCI, MERCY]: It’s definitely therapeutic. I feel like it helps people actually understand what’s going on. Because I’m not very good at talking or saying things but I’m good at singing them. I’m not smart in any conversation face-to-face but then you’ll listen to one of my songs and think, “Is she smart?” Sometimes!
[UNPUBLISHED]: Has it led to more open conversations with loved ones about what you’ve been going through?
[MERCI, MERCY]: 100%. I feel like my mum finds it easier to talk to me now because I’ve always been depressed but she didn’t understand how to deal with it or what to do when I was younger. Writing this music, I don’t have to actually speak to them, which kind of makes it more comfortable. Like, “I know you’re not okay, do you want to go to the doctor or something?” And I’m like, “Yes, I do want to go to the doctor, thank you!”
[UNPUBLISHED]: Let’s turn now to your brand-new single “Sick To My Stomach”! What was it like to work with your collaborator Chris Collins on the song?
[MERCI, MERCY]: He’s so amazing! He was still in Sydney where I live when we did this song together and he made me feel so safe. We have this thing where he’ll jam and do his whole producing thing, and I’ll go away, have a cigarette, write a whole verse or chorus, go into a little room and be a hermit. And then I come out and I’m like, “Hello Chris, I wrote this, do you like it?” And he’ll be like, “Brilliant!” He’s really sweet, very wholesome.
[UNPUBLISHED]: What do you love about the single?
[MERCI, MERCY]: Everything that’s played on the guitar. It always gets me. Obviously, my favorite lyrics have to be the whole chorus because I remember I had cigarette butts in my pocket. It smelled so bad and I was so hungover and I was like, “Oh man, this just makes me sick to my stomach!”
[UNPUBLISHED]: You also have a music video that will soon release alongside it. What did you love about filming the video?
[MERCI, MERCY]: Everyone was so nice! I was so anxious going into it because I’m not very good with people but I walked in and everyone made me feel so comfortable. And I got to break a mirror and I did it on the first go! That was so fun but so terrifying. Like I actually broke it!
[UNPUBLISHED]: What do you hope listeners take away from the song and your music overall?
[MERCI, MERCY]: You know when people try to make your problems seem smaller because there’s someone going through something worse? I hope people understand that no matter what you’re going through, it’s what you’re going through and you shouldn’t let other people feel like it’s not that important.
[UNPUBLISHED]: Following this single, I understand you also have a sophomore EP releasing later this year. What can you tell us about the project?
[MERCI, MERCY]: Look forward to some songs that won’t be about alcohol! But also there will be some songs about alcohol. It will be very different from my old stuff but still fun. I hope people will still love me.
[UNPUBLISHED]: How would you say your music has evolved over time?
[MERCI, MERCY]: I’ve become more sure of myself. I know what I want and don’t want now. So when I go into a studio, I’m like, “Can we have more instruments?” because I love the sound of guitars and bass. I’m better at saying “No, thank you.”
[UNPUBLISHED]: Besides vocals, do you play any instruments yourself?
[MERCI, MERCY]: Ukulele and I play a bit of piano but not well. And some guitar. I’m not talented on instruments but I can strum.
[UNPUBLISHED]: What do you love about performing live?
[MERCI, MERCY]: When that one person in the front row knows the lyrics to your song and you make eye contact and you’re like, “This one’s for you!” And one of my band members is my brother and the rest I’ve basically known since birth so it’s nice being able to experience that with them.
[UNPUBLISHED]: What’s it like working with your brother?
[MERCI, MERCY]: He can be annoying because he’s a lot older than me. But he loves me so much and takes care of me.
[UNPUBLISHED]: What advice would you give to young aspiring musicians hoping to begin their own careers?
[MERCI, MERCY]: Don’t listen to anybody who tells you that you can’t do it, especially your teachers. They are 100% wrong. Do what you want to do!
Photo by Maybelle Thieu