“Labels Are for Clothes” - And Even Then, Maybe Not.
If I asked you to name a label right now, what would you say? Would you name a brand? Tell me your sexuality? Your dress size?
Labels are constant. I believe labeling ourselves puts us into a box and limits us and others from our full potential. I remember a discussion with some past friends regarding what film we should see at the cinema. They had ruled out a romantic comedy because they thought since I mainly watched science fiction, I would hate it. But I had never said I did not like romantic comedies, they had assumed that. I asked why they thought that. Their answer was because at the time I wore a lot of black clothes listened to pop-punk and predominantly watched science fiction films. Then it all clicked in my head that because I had presented myself in this way, they assumed I would not like something so traditionally girly. But I am guilty too, we all are, to pre-judging someone and aligning our assumptions with other people.
There is a question of the positives of labeling oneself. In terms of meeting new people, what do you ask them? You tend to ask about their music tastes, their zodiac sign, aspirations, their jobs…etc. Then as we learn more about this person, we then make the decision if we want to continue the budding friendship or relationship. That said, we are taking the information and usually aligning it with our pre-conceptions. In some cases, it helps us to make friends and start relationships. In other cases, that does not happen.
I recall someone asking what my zodiac sign was and after I replied “Aries,” their face dropped. They inquired about how I was not as bitchy as other Aries they had encountered. Though I understood the appeal of astrology, I found it odd how they had presumed I would be characterized as angry because they had met someone else with my zodiac sign and thought I was a carbon copy. It makes me wonder that if that was the first thing they learned about me, would they have continued talking to me?
Labeling and stereotypes have been circling the human race for as long as we can remember, it even travels back to the terms are you a hunter or a gatherer? Are you the brains or the brawn? It explains the pressure put on the youth of today to decide what occupation they will have. People are wanting to know how you will fit into this society. Are you here to entertain us on stage or perform surgery? How important are you?
It should also be said that we as people play this part well. Social media is a great example, in bios we are meant to sum ourselves and our personality into a few sentences. Are we funny? Are we professional? We have become so desensitized to it that we do not realize how it affects our self-esteem and can build barriers between ourselves and others. Weirdly enough, this is the same process we go through when applying for a job. We are consistently selling ourselves to strangers, first impressions are ongoing, and it’s exhausting. No wonder we are tired.
Labels can hold a lot of power for some and for others mean nothing. I have been using some of these terms quite lightly, but I understand the weight that they can hold. Labels that affect how others can listen to you, how they understand you, how these labels can be met with such hatred. Trans. Black. Immigrant. Gay. Non-binary. Sex Worker. There are labels we attach to ourselves and others that are put on us by other people. Labels can be met with anger, can gain bigotry responses. But they can also connect us.
Let people know you as you are, do not be put into a box because they decided to label you. They put these pre-conceptions, and you do not have to live up to anyone’s expectations but your own.
Petition of the month
“Have nonbinary be included as an option under the GRP (Gender Recognition Panel)/ GRC (Gender Recognition Certificate), in order to allow those identifying as non-binary to be legally seen as their true gender identity. As well as having ‘Non-binary’ be seen as a valid transgender identity.”