Alexa Cappelli on Friendships, Letting Go and Embracing Flaws in “Lose Lose”
Rising pop star Alexa Cappelli writes beautifully vulnerable songs about coming to terms with the aspects of our lives that we can’t control and embracing the lessons instead. Her latest explosive alt-pop single release “Lose Lose” follows “Temporary” on Arista Records, and details her intuitive dream following a friendship breakup.
Cappelli embraces her flaws and all throughout her confessional undertones in “Lose Lose” as she tells the universal story of cutting the cord on a toxic friendship.
Alongside the track, Cappelli releases a music video that chronicles her intuitive nightmare about the friendship that no longer served her. Surrounded by chess pieces, the songstress feels as if she’s playing a losing game with someone who is shifting blame and isn’t giving the same energy as Cappelli is putting into the friendship.
“I'm not ashamed of my flaws or my imperfections, so I always love being able to have that be something underlying, but not necessarily like the main focus, which is kind of how I look at myself,” Cappelli says. “It's like vulnerability in a way I'm being rejected by this person, like nothing I'm doing is right and that hurts and that stings, but I'm turning it back on its head and being like there's a problem with this person obviously because I can't be losing much.”
[UNPUBLISHED]: Thank you for sitting down and talking to Unpublished Magazine again, it’s super exciting to have you back to talk to us about your latest single release “Lose Lose.” It’s really confessional and I would love to know more about the inspiration behind the track.
[ALEXA]: This is a song that I wrote when I was going through a friend breakup. It's so interesting compared to a song like “Temporary” or “Could’ve Just Left Me Alone” because those are more relational in the form of a partner but, with friends, it's so hard. I feel like sometimes it hurts even a little bit more, but this person that I really cared about and eventually it was just becoming more of a loss to stay in the friendship than it would have been to leave. Walking away was really hard and honestly, a lot of friendships that I've had in the past that I just don't have anymore, they faded or just didn't fit or it was mutual. But this was just, like, brutal. It was paragraph long text messages and lots of blame and pointing fingers. This person clearly had trust issues going into the friendship and I just wanted to be there for her as just a friend because I know people need community and friends in our lives and I really did enjoy her company when she offered it kindly. Eventually it got sour and I was doing everything wrong, so I had to just say bye and cut it off, but of course I got called names for that as well. At the end of the day, she can call me whenever she wants. I think the song really was just for those people who maybe have a hard time speaking up in friendships where they might be being used or just not treated fairly, or maybe it's taking a bit more energy than they're actually getting back. Hopefully this song can be something like that to people and bad friendships.
[UNPUBLISHED]: My favorite lyrics that stood out to me were “Everytime your name comes up on my phone / I don’t know what I’ll get / Making me apologize for things you know I never said.” To me it hits close to home and it’s a feeling of walking on eggshells. Is there a specific lyric or message that stands out to you the most, like why do you love this song?
[ALEXA]: In the music video, after I ended the friendship with her I saw her at a party and I stayed outside the whole night. The second night I saw her I was like, she's obviously going to be uncomfortable with me. I'm going to be uncomfortable with her. I'm going to do my best to make her comfortable. I'm going to walk outside. I stayed outside all night talking to someone who was by themselves and having a good time and then I ended up crashing at this friend's house and she left. I had a nightmare that night of her just telling me off and screaming in my face, and I woke up to another text message about how I made her uncomfortable by literally not even being in the room. She went and left all the gifts and cards that I had ever given her on my parents front porch. It was just bad. When I say “Now the bar is on the floor / Two whole years left on the porch,” that line it's actually true because she gave me all my stuff back.
[UNPUBLISHED]: Dreams are crazy because I always say a woman's intuition never lies and it can truly predict so much about other people's intentions towards you.
[ALEXA]: Yeah, and the music video is like a dream sequence, like I go to sleep, I look at my phone, I go to bed and then I'm losing all these games and then I wake up and I'm done.
[UNPUBLISHED]: Did you have any breakthroughs or lessons when creating “Lose Lose?”
[ALEXA]: I definitely had some lessons for sure. I now know what kind of energy I need in my friendships, and I think it's just a lot more understanding than this person was able to give. I think the career path that I'm choosing is taxing enough on myself, let alone like my friends, so being with people and around people who understand that and are offended by it or upset by it is draining. I have some really, really amazing friends in my life, and a lot of them do the same thing that I do, so they get it but even the ones I have that don't are so supportive. I think I raised the bar at least as far as how many friends I have in my life, how many people I've truly let in to see everything and what kind of energy I'm giving those who don't really meet those standards.
[UNPUBLISHED]: I love the “Lose Lose” cover art. Did you come up with the concept of the chess pieces, what's the symbolism behind that?
[ALEXA]: Yes, my management and I were talking about “Lose Lose” being the next song before we even solidified it yet. We were talking about how it feels like you’re playing games and for “Lose Lose” we can incorporate the game emoji, just because I've been doing emojis with the releases so far. The chess piece made a lot of sense because if you don't know how to play chess, you don't know what's gonna happen, like you don't know what the next piece is gonna do. I think I'm gonna start learning how to actually play chess just for my own fun, but I wanted to incorporate the idea of playing games.
[UNPUBLISHED]: How was your experience filming the music video and did you direct it yourself and come up with the concepts yourself? What did that look like for you?
[ALEXA]: We had a few different concepts in mind going into the shoot, we definitely wanted to incorporate the last song “Could’ve Just Left Me Alone,” we had like little teasers in that song to the next one and then I really wanted “Lose Lose” and “Temporary” to be somewhat connected, so I wore the same dress that I wore in “Temporary” in the beginning of “Lose Lose.” I just wanted it to feel like I'm coming home from a job which was what I was doing, and just having a bad dream about a friend behind the scenes.
[UNPUBLISHED]: In your EP Confused @ 22 and in “Lose Lose” you are exposing yourself quite a lot, how do you feel exposing yourself in such an honest and vulnerable way? Was it hard for you with the confessional undertones you convey?
[ALEXA]: I like how you said undertones because that is kind of like what I'm going for. I think like the baseline I'm very open and I'm not ashamed of my flaws or my imperfections. So I always love being able to have that be something underlying, but not necessarily like the main focus, which is kind of how I look at myself. I think that duality is really fun, like if it's a sad song, having it sound fun, or if it's a happy song, having it sound sad. “Lose Lose” feels like it’s right on the dot and the lyrics match up in a way which is fun. It's like vulnerability in a way I'm being rejected by this person, like nothing I'm doing is right and that hurts and that stings, but I'm turning it back on its head and being like there's a problem with this person obviously because I can't be losing much.
[UNPUBLISHED]: Have you taken any new approaches and experimented more either lyrically or sonically since your EP dropped with your latest singles?
[ALEXA]: I feel like I'm definitely leaning more into that rock-alt sound. I definitely have a lot of pop in me still and I think I'm gonna keep running with that pop sound and definitely work on some more songs for my album, to sound pop and encompass it all and bring it all back together in a way. I do love a distorted guitar, something about it just makes me just want to scream.
[UNPUBLISHED]: I would love to learn anything about this upcoming album, whatever you want to share.
[ALEXA]: “Could’ve Just Left Me Alone,” “Temporary” and “Lose Lose,” those are all going on it and if you can kind of like pick apart the concept of each of those songs, it'll make the title a lot of sense once I do share it. I'm really excited. There are quite a few songs in the works. I love the concept and I feel like what I'm gonna say is that it has been a process. This last year and a half of my life, let alone the last six months have been really wild, and I feel like wherever there is new growth, there's a lot of loss as well.
[UNPUBLISHED]: Who's an artist you've been listening to a lot lately?
[ALEXA]: Obviously Taylor Swift, I got tickets. I was one of the lucky few. I love Taylor, grew up on Taylor. I love Julia Michaels and have always loved Julie Michaels. Sabrina Carpenter put out an album I think that was really good. I went and saw Bad Suns last week, they were really good and I love their alt-rock sound.
[UNPUBLISHED]: How's the response been from fans since the “Lose Lose” release?
[ALEXA]: It's actually been really good. I know that numbers are sometimes hard to gauge involvement, but this release, I get a lot more behind the scenes, not as much posting about it, but I did leak the song to my super fans. I really just took them along the whole journey, and I think that they really appreciated that and even like the little release party I had was private with just the super fans and we did a trivia night – Alexa Cappelli trivia. It was really cool to see how excited they were. They knew about it before I even posted about it, so it was really cool, and they felt honored and flattered to get to hear it first.
[UNPUBLISHED]: How are you feeling in this current area of your career right now following your latest release and your live shows? What does the rest of the year look like for you that you'd love to share with the magazine?
[ALEXA]: I feel like a lot of the work that I've done in the music that I've made up until this point in my life has been preparation and I know that there's been a lot of growth that has happened in this last year, but something in me just feels like it's still only like the beginning and I really can't wait to tour and get to see people in person and keep performing. This album is going to be so special, like it's my first album. I'm going to make so many albums in my life, but this one is just going to feel really exciting, especially coming through the EP and putting all the dots together and my whole life story. I just want more people that I trust and can work with and really continue to grow as an artist and continue honing in on my sound and meeting people.
