Shhhh... Listen! Do You Hear The Sound Of Gratitude?

Life can really kick us in the ass. Wildfires are popping up all over the west coast, there were the Hong Kong protests that took up pages of media in the news, and there are over 51 million cases of COVID-19 worldwide. On top of normal stress-inducing life circumstances, this year has helped many of us hit a major low through mental health.

At least, this was the case for me. My depressive symptoms of self-deprecation and general sadness hit particularly hard after I experienced the end of my first relationship. This is a classic tragedy case in and of itself, and now the world had its hands full with a pandemic as well. 

The breakup process was prolonged longer than it should have for my partner and I; each new time we fought, we knew the inevitable was coming. While we both understood that our relationship wasn’t sustainable it was just hard to let go. How are you supposed to say goodbye to the first person you’ve ever loved? I’m a selfish person and honestly, I just wasn’t ready. He had taught me so much. He was there to support me in all of the messy parts of my existence in this world and loved me despite all of my flaws. 

Then I did get the courage to say bye and suddenly I was left to deal with all of that myself. I think many people can relate to understanding that while it’s better in the long run, you’re sad, angry, and the questions about what you could’ve done better won’t stop berating you. The depressive monster in my head replayed images of past relationship memories or brought me to negative thoughts and tendencies that I didn’t care to have at all. But there comes a point in the cycle of heartbreak when all of the flutters of overwhelming emotions become enough. I tried a lot of different ways to help myself heal, but they came and went as I tried to figure out what worked for me. One of the ones that stuck was the practice of gratitude.

“It's kind of the game-changer for life...remembering to be grateful reminds you to be present... like we're always thinking about the next thing, always focusing on the next goal...” - Rohini Elyse

Gratitude can be both a fleeting feeling and a habitual trait. The way that you feel appreciation towards life is completely unique and personal to you. Either way, it can allow you to be more open to having positive experiences and help you stay in the moment. 

Whenever I was feeling overwhelmed with negative thoughts I would take note and try to focus myself instead on the crisp air of fall that I loved so much. Or notice the perfect song that happened to play at just the right time. 

Being thankful for the things happening around you right now can really help take you outside of your own thoughts. There’s a whole world bustling with energy that doesn’t have anything to do with the messiness in your mind. To realize it and find the beauty in those little moments was a game-changer for my mental health. 

Journaling is one of the most popular and efficient ways to go about incorporating gratitude into your life. The idea of jotting down all the details of the day into existence that brought you joy- the little wins that would otherwise go unnoticed is so romantic. It can be difficult to keep up with journaling, though, if you’re not one to keep up with routines or just tend to forget where you placed your stuff, such as myself. What I found worked was to create voice memos instead as a substitution. What I love most about is that I can actually hear my past self and see how much I’ve grown. Plus, you can do it anytime and anywhere as long as you’ve got your phone on you. 

Finding things to be grateful for can help you recognize the value of yourself and the life around you. It can help manifest more positive emotions, help you deal with different struggles that come your way, and help build stronger relationships. As someone who spent years of their life hating themselves and the decisions that I’ve made in the past, gratitude taught me a lesson that I desperately needed to learn: that who I was, what I offered to the world, and the life I had was more than enough.