Why I Create Playlists for Every Thought That Crosses My Mind
As someone who has trouble expressing their emotions or putting what they are feeling into words, I adore using music to express it for me. Curating playlists for myself has given me a unique outlet to convey exactly how I’m feeling without having to utter a single word. Every time I feel an overwhelming wave of emotion, I make an immensely specific Spotify playlist for that exact mood or situation.
This means that I have over a hundred playlists because I create them at every minor inconvenience. Additionally, I have a vivid imagination, leading me to create playlists for books I’m enjoying or a quote in a film that makes my brain spiral. By doing this, it feels as if I’m watching a movie in my head that I created all by myself.
Curating playlists is a hidden form of art that takes an immense amount of time, patience, and detail. Sometimes you may want the playlist to tell a story from start to end, which means that every single song you choose has an intention behind it and moves the story along. There needs to be a magic combination that expresses the unsaid feelings you’re harboring on your own. At times, my mind can race too fast, which makes it tough to understand my true emotions. Here is where the playlist comes in and saves the day. I take the time to sit down, breathe deep, and find the songs that sound the way the emotions I cannot articulate feel. In a sense, it allows me to organize my thoughts whilst immersing myself in my feelings.
Other times your heart may desire a more chaotic order that still flows well together. This could for instance be any song that feels reminiscent of a memory or fits the storyline of a fictional character. The music you listen to can either reflect your mood or impact your mood. For this reason I adore having a few go-to morning playlists to immerse in while sipping my morning coffee or taking a walk. These are songs that immediately lift my spirits and make me feel like being surrounded by sunshine and rainbows.
Music has always been an important part of my life. It can be used as both an outlet and a form of communication. If you choose to share your playlists with others, it can function as a bridge for understanding and connection between people. The implicit meaning of each song can connect one person’s experience to the other, which can make them feel less alone while still being able to create their own interpretation of the music. It’s a beautiful medium that has helped individuals everywhere feel as if they have a purpose in a life that often feels overwhelming.
As someone who finds comfort in constant change and has an avoidant attachment style, letting people see your true emotions can become immensely difficult. I admit that I am hyper-independent and don’t easily get attached to anything, however my playlists are the one constant in my life. Wherever I go, I know I will be able to reminisce on old memories, friends who became strangers, and lovers who never lasted. I can relive the most important parts of my life through the playlists I created at the time. With a few simple clicks on my Spotify, I am immediately pulled into vacations in Greece, early mornings in Croatia, and late nights in Norway. It makes me think of the person I used to be and the simple nothings that felt excruciating at the time. I can always look back and know how I felt in each pivotal moment in my life. In a sense, a playlist becomes a memory book of your life.
With this being said, there is a comfort behind the knowledge that I can create a new playlist, symbolically starting from scratch each time. It reminds me that I have the power to change if I set my mind to it. I can move around the world, find new places to call home, and those who are strangers today might become the most important people in my life tomorrow. Throughout all of it, I will have my memory book with me, documenting each moment I felt alive.